Well, I'd Buy You a Green Dress, But Not a Real Green Dress That's Cruel

Do you ever play the "If I had a million dollars" game? Of course you do. You would be less then human if you didn't or your last name is Hilton or Winfrey and you already have way too much money in the bank. TL and I usually start playing this game while in the car on a road trip. It typically starts by one of us noticing the unbelievable jackpot amount listed on some sort of flashy, horribly designed sign taped crockedly to the convenient store window. After pulling away from our pit stop in nowhere mid-America, the game begins...

We start talking about what we would do if we won that lottery. Usually the game starts off with us winning some ungodly amount of $500 million or so. And of course we take the full payoff with penalty. Who even accepts the yearly payout?

So here is our plan. First we pay off all debt, pay off the house and buy a few other modest houses. Not some "I'm rich with new money houses", but truly modest, 2,000 square feet or so, homes. One in the Rockies, one on the Gulf Coast, a town house in New York City and Old Town and something nice, but simple, in Oklahoma. Probably Stillwater so we have a place to stay for ball games. We also buy a practical, non-gas-guzzling car and of course throw the dream party.

Ahh, the dream party. We usually can plan the dream party for about 30 or so miles on the road before getting bored with the subject. We start with the guest list, which is intimate. Only close friends and family. We don't want people to only like us for our money, so we gotta keep it real. Then we move on to venue planning. The party takes place over several weeks and usually the adventure is overseas and involves several legs. Almost always we include a night of party somewhere on a remote island, then continue the fun on a super party-boat sailing the Mediterranean followed by a few days of skiing the Alps. We would then do a Jolie/Pitt stop (adopting babies optional) in a remote country and build some sort of Oprah like school for the poor. After working hard to help others we end with a night or two in Amsterdam. Hey, we realize not everyone can just take off work to go gallivanting around the world with us. That is why we would insist on giving those on the trip a decent amount of money so they didn't have to work for a few months and could instead just have fun with us. We would of course fly first class but I don't see the need to own a jet. That seems a bit over the top.

After exhausting ourselves from the whirl-wind celebration across the planet, we would settle back into a sort of real-life routine, so that the money didn't go to our heads. TL, who is one of those rare people that gets paid to do something he absolutely loves, would likely start-up a design firm of his own. Maybe branches in several major markets. We would also make small investments by giving business loans/gifts to family and friends so they too can open their American Dream; be it restaurants, bookstores, camping shops or knit shops. So long as everyone is happy, working and making money too. We would also share our money with charities and give a large amount to our Alma Mater. Not a T. Boone amount but large enough for a building with our names on it.

And then TL and I come back to reality and realize that we aren't likely to win the $500 million lottery, especially since we didn't even buy a lottery ticket at that last stop and we just crossed the state line and into a non-lottery state. So we finish up the game with what ifs. What if we won just $10 million or hell, even a million. We could easily pay off debt, eat a few fancy-pants dinners, and I wouldn't have to work...
if I had a million dollars.

Comments

[SouthtoStilly]

I'll bet that you are the only person who would buy a Stillwater shack after winning the jackpot.

I'm one of those who never play the "win the lotto game" because I'm too much of a pessimist (it'll never happen). I wouldn't mind a Jolie/Angie/every-kid-in-Somalia stop, though. ;)

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